Two agents and twenty-four rejections for my first memoir Poetic License. I railed and stewed, set it aside, then knew they were right—the writing was “beautiful” , the story “needed” but the abuse “wasn’t bad enough”, your father wasn’t “famous enough”, the story line wasn’t “clear” enough. I knew I needed developmental help of if I didn’t know the word yet and found that after several years experimenting with editors telling me “go this way” or “go that way”. Brooke pulled apart the book, wrenched out 20k words, told me it wasn’t about the abuse so much as about powerful men and their privileged, which got me rewriting the whole thing over one year. Then I got a contract and it came out 18 months later. It would not have been what it became without those rejections even if was crushed by each of them. Thank you Jennifer for normalizing this part of a writers journey. ❤️
The first is Poetic License primarily about my relationship with my dad. The second is The Butcher, the Embezzler, and the Fall Guy an investigative, true crime memoir about my grandfather’s role in a national scandal at Hormel Foods in 1921.
Love this post, Jennifer, thank you, and I feel you on the labor of holding it together as a mother and frustrated writer when sometimes our best looks like far less than our best selves. My story: the week after my community college contract was not renewed - after 16 years as an adjunct - I signed with an amazing agent who said all the things I'd ever hoped to hear regarding my YA novel, which was about a group of girls in a mandated violence prevention support group. The agent tried through the summer but could not sell the book. On a phone conversation while I was putting up Halloween decorations, she told me to rewrite the book...I remember hanging up the phone and throwing a rubber black bat across the room while cursing (Step #1). But, I dug in and tore apart the plot, added a key character, and rewrote the novel during the dark months leading up to the 2016 election; the story line turned darker too (Step #2). And still, the agent told me the story wasn't working; the MC didn't have enough agency. She told me to write another book. What I did was change my career, finding some financial security rather than the hustle of being an adjunct (Step #3), which did give me the breathing room to see that book was not a YA novel at all, it was a memoir (Step #4). I was the real life support group facilitator and the story was about what those young adults taught me. I've been working on it ever since (Step #5). P.S., the career change did not work out too well because teaching is where my heart is!
Wow! What a story Nancy. Isn't it something to hear...write another book as if presto-pow we can just whip them out? It's crushing and in many ways, not completely helpful. Hang in there. You'll go back to it and make it better. A simple thing like POV change, or tense change, or reading something that blows your mind and boom, you'll think in a new way. At least that's been my experience. I say...the story is simmering. That's all. You are growing. Keep me posted!
Whew. That’s tough. I felt this. I’m becoming more patient with manuscript rejection - just had another hard one this week. But I was surprised by my level of ability to see it for what it was: another long game moment. A low, there will be a high. This is growth :) (love the picture of you and your daughter 💜)
The reality hit this morning in a therapy session… if you don’t put your work out in the world, then there is no rejection to fear.
And now I read this, thankful it came in my email ( I’m sooooo overwhelmed with Substack some days) and I honor your diligence and have so much respect for your process!
Music to my ears...doing my best to get you the info in a tight, focused, and yet totally true/human way. High bar but Substack demands it, as well as our overloaded in-boxes!
Rejection is a part of this journey Thank you for sharing your journey and how you've processed it.
For me, I always try to go to my Writer's mission statement and understand the rejection in that context. Does it change my statement? reinforce it? Or does the mission statement make the rejection irrelevant?
For me, the most important is to have quality and interesting stories as a legacy and for the work to pay for itself. With that clarity, I find making choices (on the biz side) a little easier.
Two agents and twenty-four rejections for my first memoir Poetic License. I railed and stewed, set it aside, then knew they were right—the writing was “beautiful” , the story “needed” but the abuse “wasn’t bad enough”, your father wasn’t “famous enough”, the story line wasn’t “clear” enough. I knew I needed developmental help of if I didn’t know the word yet and found that after several years experimenting with editors telling me “go this way” or “go that way”. Brooke pulled apart the book, wrenched out 20k words, told me it wasn’t about the abuse so much as about powerful men and their privileged, which got me rewriting the whole thing over one year. Then I got a contract and it came out 18 months later. It would not have been what it became without those rejections even if was crushed by each of them. Thank you Jennifer for normalizing this part of a writers journey. ❤️
That's incredible! Thanks for sharing!!!
Great share, Gretchen. So you published with SheWrites?
Yes. Great experience with two memoirs.
Bravo! Share the titles.
The first is Poetic License primarily about my relationship with my dad. The second is The Butcher, the Embezzler, and the Fall Guy an investigative, true crime memoir about my grandfather’s role in a national scandal at Hormel Foods in 1921.
Love this post, Jennifer, thank you, and I feel you on the labor of holding it together as a mother and frustrated writer when sometimes our best looks like far less than our best selves. My story: the week after my community college contract was not renewed - after 16 years as an adjunct - I signed with an amazing agent who said all the things I'd ever hoped to hear regarding my YA novel, which was about a group of girls in a mandated violence prevention support group. The agent tried through the summer but could not sell the book. On a phone conversation while I was putting up Halloween decorations, she told me to rewrite the book...I remember hanging up the phone and throwing a rubber black bat across the room while cursing (Step #1). But, I dug in and tore apart the plot, added a key character, and rewrote the novel during the dark months leading up to the 2016 election; the story line turned darker too (Step #2). And still, the agent told me the story wasn't working; the MC didn't have enough agency. She told me to write another book. What I did was change my career, finding some financial security rather than the hustle of being an adjunct (Step #3), which did give me the breathing room to see that book was not a YA novel at all, it was a memoir (Step #4). I was the real life support group facilitator and the story was about what those young adults taught me. I've been working on it ever since (Step #5). P.S., the career change did not work out too well because teaching is where my heart is!
Wow! What a story Nancy. Isn't it something to hear...write another book as if presto-pow we can just whip them out? It's crushing and in many ways, not completely helpful. Hang in there. You'll go back to it and make it better. A simple thing like POV change, or tense change, or reading something that blows your mind and boom, you'll think in a new way. At least that's been my experience. I say...the story is simmering. That's all. You are growing. Keep me posted!
Thank you for this honest, beautiful post, Jennifer. I’m amazed by the steadfastness of this community of writers.
Hey Brad, thank you. Steadfastness. Great word.
Whew. That’s tough. I felt this. I’m becoming more patient with manuscript rejection - just had another hard one this week. But I was surprised by my level of ability to see it for what it was: another long game moment. A low, there will be a high. This is growth :) (love the picture of you and your daughter 💜)
Thanks Amy, great to see you here and commenting. Yes, rejection is tough stuff. This art form, tougher. But we find our way through. Yes?
My girl read the post and gave me the thumbs up. Beautiful in and out. A true treasure.
The reality hit this morning in a therapy session… if you don’t put your work out in the world, then there is no rejection to fear.
And now I read this, thankful it came in my email ( I’m sooooo overwhelmed with Substack some days) and I honor your diligence and have so much respect for your process!
What a gift!!!
Music to my ears...doing my best to get you the info in a tight, focused, and yet totally true/human way. High bar but Substack demands it, as well as our overloaded in-boxes!
Rejection is a part of this journey Thank you for sharing your journey and how you've processed it.
For me, I always try to go to my Writer's mission statement and understand the rejection in that context. Does it change my statement? reinforce it? Or does the mission statement make the rejection irrelevant?
What is your writer's mission statement? That's a cool idea.
It’s helped me stay focus and not get distracted with the shiny things and take some things too seriously.
Very nice. I meant specifically? Can you share the wording (or is way too personal?)
Creating and Sharing stories I find interesting that earns back my investment.
For me, the most important is to have quality and interesting stories as a legacy and for the work to pay for itself. With that clarity, I find making choices (on the biz side) a little easier.
Creating and Sharing stories I find interesting that earns back my investment.