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Writer Chick With a Ukulele's avatar

Happy new year, Jennifer! Thank you for posting this today and I wish you and your family a new year filled with peace love and joy. I have been reading all your posts here and I have not responded. I apologize for that. But know that I am reading them and I’m so happy that I can still hear your wise words and your stories this post resonated with me because I am currently recovering from major foot surgery. I cannot put any weight on my right foot for a couple more weeks. My surgery was on December 4 so I had to stay off my foot for six weeks and it’s been eye-opening frustrating and downright scary for me. This is the first time in my 65 years of life that I have had to rely on others to help me, namely, my boyfriend Savoy, who has been really great however, he is a man. I can tell that his patience is waning though he will never admit it. I literally need help for everything, except I can’t go to the restroom by myself on my knee scooter and take care of myself there. But he cooks all my meals prepares my coffee make sure I have food and water in here and if I have to leave he hast to help me get down three stops to the other room and out the door I’ve barely left this room anyway when you wrote about how we as women feel responsible for everybody and everything, I totally understood because that’s exactly the way I have been. I raised my kids. I supported my kids financially and emotionally . I made sure we had a a home. I remember feeling responsible for my brother and sister when my mother would have her mental health issues and I was young so I learned very early how to take care of others around me and it’s followed me my entire life.

Of course I had to do it all. That’s what we do so now I sit here with a cast on my right foot all the way up my calf and I feel terrible that I have to ask Savoy to do everything for me. It’s not right I told myself it’s not supposed to be like this. Then I called my family in California and asked if the kids needed or wanted anything for Christmas. It’s OK mom we got this is the standard response. I could barely get a hold of my daughter who turned 40 just three days ago because she’s so busy and she just began a wonderful relationship with another woman. This is her very first serious relationship and I couldn’t be more happy for her. My younger daughter in LA is also preoccupied but they do say hello and happy new year. When did it all change. Heck even my older son who is still on dialysis and does live here in Oregon is super busy and has only been over here to visit me twice. Sorry mom I’m trying to earn some money because disability doesn’t pay much he tells me I know he loves me and I love him but he also has a girlfriend and an ex girlfriend and well he just has a life and that’s good This is been hard for me.

As for me, I am still writing. Some of it has been painful, but I have learned how to get through it now I wanted to finish my memoir by the end of this year and here it is January 1, 2023 and I’ve been really down on myself, because I haven’t quite finished the Damned book, but then I realized something. I have an entire solid draft of my book I mean the book is finished, but it is not the final draft. It is also not the first draft I would call it second or third, because I have work on each chapter individually, and this is the hardest I have ever worked on, just one project and not flit it off to another , this is the first time I have ever had a finished draft of the memoir that I worked on for too many damn years. I shouldn’t be down on myself my gosh I am proud and excited that I have a finished draft that is done but of course not done you know exactly what I mean and I want to thank you for all the skills I learned in your classes because they have really helped. I have learned how to edit my work go through and change and delete things and I learned about structure in my book has a definite structure now I have my ending my beginning everything. So thank you for being out there and for continuing to spread the word. Also, the story about how Blackburg got published is fascinating. I have no idea how I’m gonna get this book, published exactly yet, but I know one thing it’s going to be published in 2023.

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Laurel Anderson's avatar

Happy New Year! May 2023 be productive yet peaceful, meaningful, memorable ... and fun!

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